Tag Archives: raising children

BFFs!!

mom, motherhood, Parenting, Spiritual Encouragement, , , , , , ,

mother_and_daughter_posters-rcd3c957918da415a99f659595fb6a45c_sls1_8byvr_512

BFF “Best Friends Forever”

We’ve all heard that term I am sure.  I have three friends that I have had since grade school who are and will forever be my “BFFs”.  We have been through a lot together, supported each other in life, and now have to be together in case one of us forgets something…the other one fills in the blank!!

But recently I witnessed something that I had witnessed before…and cringed in the same manner I had before…a momma trying to be her teenage girl’s best friend.  Over the years I have seen this with some of my sons’ friends and ….gulp….I am sorry, that is not our job!!

We are to “parent” our children.  There will come a time when we become more of their friend, but I believe we are to always be the “parent”.  It seems like I became good friends with my own mother when I had my first son.  Our circumstances were different, I needed her advice on mothering.  We talked a lot, and now that I am older we talk a lot more.  We are almost experiencing some of the same things together! (She’s 20 years older for those wondering). But trust me, she is still my “parent” and lets me know sometimes.  Usually I needed that parenting myself to be honest!!

The King James Version Dictionary defines parent as “1.  A father or mother; he or she that produces young. The duties of parents to their children are to maintain, protect and educate them. When parents are wanting in authority, children are wanting in duty. 2. That which produces; cause; source.”

Wester’s definition- a person who is a father or mother : a person who has a child: an animal or plant that produces a young animal or plant: something out of which another thing has developed

 This may be wrong, but if my boys do something or say something “off”, I tell them.  I am not afraid they won’t like me anymore.  They don’t have to listen, they are adults…and I do it in an appropriate way and don’t nag.  At least that is what I think I do!! But we are still friends…just not best friends!!

In fact, truth be told…I “parent” a lot of people around me.  I just started a part time job and I am working with young people for the first time in years…I have already been talking like a mother.  Guess none of them will claim me as their “BFF”!

Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

“Obey” is hupakouo which means to “listen, to harken, of one who on the knock at the door comes to listen who it is;  to harken to a command; obey, be obedient to, submit to”

I ask you, how can our children “obey” us if we are too busy being their BFFs and worried they won’t like us anymore? Trust me when I say that kids need boundaries.  AND kids want boundaries!  They don’t know how to articulate that sometimes, but they do.  I have seen it with my own children and with those I taught in the public schools for years.

We can be their friends….just don’t let being their friend overshadow being their parent!

Blessings dear ones~

IN CHRIST ALONE

Isaiah 55:8-9

 

Solid Food

Christianity, homeschooling, mom, motherhood, Spiritual Encouragement, Uncategorized, , , , ,

baby with food

The time under our roof is short lived to be sure….solid food available!

We have heard it or said it…”where has the time gone?” when referring to the speed in which our children grew up.  The toddler in the stroller who loved being pushed down the road is now waving out his window as he drives to his first job. The little guy who recorded his voice on the tape recorder now is a grown man answering his cell phone. And those little shoe strings that I seemed to tie forever now are tied by the adult with a shoe size of 11. So when did this happen?

I believe that all parents go through a time of questioning about faith from their children.  The time we have them under the protection of our homes is so short.  So little time to teach them the things of the Lord and how to deal with the pain and hurt that will inevitably come their way.  When they were small, a kiss and a band aide fixed the “boo-boo”.  That doesn’t always work as they get older.

The last couple of weeks I have talked to some parents whose children are truly rebelling, or being “prodigal” as I sometimes say.  I don’t know the condition of their hearts, but I know that these parents have raised them in the ways of the Lord.  These children for some reason or another have chosen another path.  How my heart aches for these parents, and these children.  

My thoughts were rather simple, love them unconditionally and keep praying.  It is a spiritual battle.  Entering into that battle as a parent….was and is truly battle.  They aren’t little anymore.

I nursed my infants.  They received the nutrition necessary at that time.  But as they grew, their need for solid food increased.  And if anyone of you has raised, or is about to raise boys….stock your refrigerator NOW! 

Peter talked of it in scripture: “Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.” 1 Peter 2:2.  Paul says in 1 Corinthians 3:2 “Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly-mere infants in Christ.  I gave you milk, not solid food for you are not yet ready.” and in Hebrews 5:13-14 “Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness.  But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.”  

What do babies need to grow physically?  What do our children need as spiritual newborns?  What do we need?  As we continue to grow and teach our children, we must provide them spiritual food as well!  Could this be deeper discussions, asking our children to share their thoughts on scripture?  Are we satisfied with just the “Sunday” teaching, or do we want more ourselves?  When we are hungry, what feeds us?  

I don’t pretend to have all the answers.  But I will encourage you in this…make teaching, reading and discussing His Word an important part of your day and your children’s day.   I was always blown away by some of the insights the boys had as little guys.  My prayer was always that they hid the WORD in their hearts…pray that your children will desire a deeper walk.  Pray for that as they get out from under your protection…and question lots of things.  Keep that line of communication open so that they will bring you their doubts and you can continue to guide them to “solid food”.

They won’t live under that roof forever, so prepare them as best you can…encourage them with “solid food.”

Blessings dear ones..

IN CHRIST ALONE

Isaiah 55:8-9

*google image, NIV Bible*

The NEW Seedlings

Christianity, homeschooling, mom, motherhood, Parenting, Spiritual Encouragement, , , , , , , , ,

phototropism

Time in the garden has its moments!!

When I first started homeschooling, I was not completely confident in my ability to teach my own children.  Oh I knew that I truly had been called to do so, but I also heard a lot of negative from well meaning family members and friends.  “You cannot protect them forever”.  “They need to learn how to deal with the ‘real’ world.”  

Exactly.

Someone told me this story, and I cannot remember who it was or I would give credit.  It is probably not exactly how I heard it…but the same principle applies.

We start our plants from seeds.  The goal is for those seeds to grow into seedlings and then into the plant or vegetable to grow to full maturity.  We cultivate them when inside.  We make sure they get enough water, good soil and plenty of sunshine.  We move them from window to window if necessary, and even put them in a greenhouse.

We put them out.  Maybe too early, maybe not.  It is our first time growing our own plants, so it is a trial run really. The seedlings settle in the ground and the roots begin to grow.  Things are looking good!  Until…

The winds come, and the little seedlings get a bit unsettled.  The rain is so heavy and the seedlings have a hard time keeping their roots in the soil.  They are a bit wobbly.  Finally the rabbits raid the garden.  The roots are so battered, bruised, water logged….the rabbits win.  The seedlings are uprooted.  They did not last.  Maybe they were put out too early.

The next time we wait longer.  The roots are stronger and established.  Once planted in the garden they seem sturdy.  The rains come.  The wind comes, and those pesky little rabbits…but the roots stay firm.  The seedlings grow into strong sturdy plants.  They survive because their root system is strong enough to withstand all those issues!!  The storms rage and of course will come…but they stand.

So can we dare apply that to our children?  Can we put them in this old world too early?  We can train, teach and educate them until we feel we should.  We can go against what the world says…and follow the will of the Father.  It is not for everybody, but is it for you and your children? Are you called to educate your children? Only you can answer that question.

Trust me when I say…those storms will come and rage.  Your childrens’ root system will be tested.  Will their roots be strong enough?

Blessings dear ones~

IN CHRIST ALONE

Isaiah 55:8-9