Tag Archives: Christianity

My Valley Fever and Sweet Syndrome Journey Chapter 3…My Hope

Biblical definitions of Hope in the Hebrew and Greek=To trust in, wait for, look for or desire something or someone; or to expect something beneficial in the future. Anticipation and the absolute certainty of God’s promises, confident expectation.

I was in Arizona, visiting my one and only grandchild and her parents. About a week before I was to come home, I developed a dry cough and thought I was reacting to the dry air and fires. I became very fatigued and attributed it to my Fibromyalgia and overdoing it.

I was wrong.  

Fast forward to October. By October 1st I was very ill and had to go to the ER on October 13, upon the insistence of my husband and neighbor. I ended up being transferred to Barnes Jewish and spent eleven total days there. I was very ill, and they did a lot of testing; I was in isolation and it was a time that the Father showed Himself over and over.

They transferred me by ambulance one evening from my local hospital, arriving at Barnes at 3:30am.  Suffice it to say, I would not recommend a two-hour ambulance ride on a bucket list! I put it on so I could check it off!

I was very ill and alone. I was peaceful, and I knew the Father was with me. We arrived on the 14th floor and the charge nurse introduced me to my nurse for that night and the next night.  

Here is where the Father affirmed his presence, and that He was my hope.

“This is your nurse. His name is Alphonse.”

“No, that cannot be,” I muttered quietly.  

I am sure they thought I was one of “those” patients.

“Yes, ma’am, he will be your nurse.”

“But that is my husband’s name!!”

No one could believe it!  

Who has that name? We all know of Alphonse Capone. But other than the Capone fellow and my husband, I knew of no others.

This nurse, Alphonse from Kenya, was such a blessing to me. His name alone was a comfort since my husband was not allowed to be there. Peace came over me. He was a believer, and we prayed for one another through those nights. 

He had a burden that he had been carrying for years, and I prayed over him. Night was the worse for my pain, so he prayed for me.

All the nurses heard the story and each time they came in my room, “Shang ra La” as I called it, I told them it could be a place of rest. The Lord let me love on every one of them and encourage them in their profession.

“Alphonse” never got to meet my “Alphonse”. In fact, he was not on duty with me after that second night. I told him we were adopting him, after all he was 35 and just a year older than our eldest. He was married, with two precious girls.  

I told our sons that they had an older brother, who just happened to be named after their dad. How “coincidental” is that? I don’t believe in coincidence. It was a “God thing” and will always be.

The doctors continued to test me for all kinds of diseases through that first week. I was in isolation, but with the Father’s continued presence, hope and support… we finally got some answers.

The Father will always be with you in your journey, no matter what it is. He is who I always knew He was. The journey may not be easy, but He will never leave you alone.

Connect the Dots

I have rewritten this post several times, and prayed about even sharing it. But I know that writing and talking have always been therapeutic for me, even since a young child. 

I was reminded that sometimes the very things we go through can actually help others. I have seen it all my life.  Things happen, so we can choose to be “BItter” or “Better”.

Which leads me to the game of “Dots.”

Remember that game?  Make dots on a paper and then take turns with others to see who can “connect the dots” and make the first square?  Your initial claims that box as your own!  Who ever has the most boxes once all the dots are connected wins the game!polka-dots-875047_1280

Connecting dots.  I have been doing some of that lately with my health. 

Over seven year and I have a couple of boxes almost connected. 

I have been praying for answers, in particular the last eight months as the pain, spasms, weakness, and swelling, etc.. have all gotten worse.  I just knew something was not right.  But I also knew that these “old earth suits” wear out.

Over six years ago I was so stressed that I quit teaching, lost a third of my hair, was diagnosed with alopecia from a biopsy, had a basal cell carcinoma removed, numbness and swelling in my feet, ankles and right hand. My back and neck hurt all the time. Then chronic pain started with my feet and went up my legs with spasms and Charlie Horses. And a hip replacement four years ago did not relieve that pain. I could go on…as could many of you.

This “earth suit” was really in need of repair. LOL

I have really made an effort to take care of myself with natural supplements, good eating, exercise.  But I really felt I hit a brick wall and no one could give me answers.  Four doctors later, five minutes into the exam…the rheumatologist/neurologist was talking about a “central nervous system disorder.”

Several questions and procedures later, my husband and I left with a lot of test orders and a lot of questions that hopefully will be answered the end of this month.  The “dots” were connecting, the game was just not over.

I just spent the week with our 15 month old granddaughter, who was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy in Sept.  She is my inspiration. She is strong, she is determined.  

I will fight this chronic pain with all I have.  I will learn as much as I can about self care. And I will trust my Abba.

Everyone has something. I know people are dealing with so many issues.  Pain is subjective and no one really understands what the other person is going through, we just pray that the Father will give us the compassion we need for each other.

My Jesus gets it. He has proven Himself faithful over and over in my life.

He gets all our pain, our heartache, our hurt.

Hang on to that….and hopefully you can connect the dots too.

Psalm 119:90 “Your faithfulness endures to all generations; you have established the earth, and it stands fast.”

~Be Encouraged Today

Tammy

He is in the Waiting

I woke up at 3am and heard this song by Bethel Music……Take Courage

Are you waiting?

You might be….job interview, doctor’s appointment, lab results, meeting…

Fear of the unknown can creep in and rob us of our courage, our joy, our faith in the Father.

The Waiting can be more painful than the results.

But our GOD is there

and not just in the results

but….in the WAITING.God is in the Waiting.

~Be Encouraged Today~

Tammy